Before I knew it I was on YouTube though, watching videos from my shows and it made everything just a little worse. I saw Water from Cologne and I could just see us jumping up and down at the barrier after spending the night in front of the stadium in our tent. Then I saw Milan, don't even get me started about Milan.... And Berne and how we danced around the back of the pit in Madrid all night after surviving the biggest stress i've had in my entire life thanks to the strike at Lisbon airport. Now some months have passed (SOME MONTHS THIS HURTS SO MUCH IT'S BEEN SO LONG) I'm actually starting to realise what we did and how many places we went to and I don't even understand how we survived everything. I mean it was kind of crazy, but I would literally do it again right now. I miss it, every single thing about it.
I just really really hope that the next time we are going to do this, because yes I honestly genuinly believe there will be a next time, that Richie will be there again with the boys. It hurts so much that he's still not back. I can't even believe that this is actually happening. I was just thinking about it again, because the first anniversary of our meeting with him is coming closer and it's so weird, I don't understand. :-( Just fix whatever is keeping you apart, it's not worth it. It can't be worth it!
Anyway, I am going back to YouTube for a while to watch some more videos and I am going to leave you with a picture of my completely updated tour wall so this post will have a proper reason to be up here. I used to have the pictures and the tickets framed but there simply was no way on earth that I could put pictures and tickets from nine more shows up there as well so I decided to re-do everything, without frames. In black and white and even though it took forever I am so in love with the result!
Bye bye bye
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